1970s Animal Uprising/Naturesploitation = always metal.
Evil-Lyn, Mistress of the Universe. Meg Foster, naturally spooky eyes aside, fell short in the ‘87 MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE. Who would be your dream-casting version?
Halloween costume solved.
Your author of HEAVY METAL MOVIES: THE BOOK, trick-or-treating soon at a pants-optional samhain rite near you.
Bob Guccione’s never-before-seen, nearly three-hour version of Caligula is online now. This is for me. For $6.95
Download it here from the Gooch site and read this fantastically appropriate bloated description:
"What is/was the reality of Caligula? The historical epic conceived and backed by Bob Guccione has gone down in movie history as one of the most outrageous runaway productions since…well, since Cleopatra, another, very different, very long historical epic.
"The story of the making of Caligula is a kind of, well, if we may be forgiven yet another film reference, a Rashomon in and of itself, with different parties, from aggrieved writer Gore Vidal to bemused star Malcolm McDowell to besieged director Tinto Brass, everyone has a different version.
"And now the Guccione Collection presents another piece of the puzzle, or answer to the puzzle. Straight from Bob Guccione’s own personal archive, an assembly of Caligula practically hand-edited by Guccione himself.
"The hard-core sex footage shot by the producer himself, expanding his ahead-of-its-time vision of a ground-breaking explicit look at the ancient world.
"The expansive narrative concocted by Vidal and shot by Brass with an all-star cast featuring Peter O’Toole, Sir John Gielgud, young Helen Mirren and of course the brilliant McDowell. The excesses of the mad emperor and the excesses of the ambitious, driven movie makers bleed into each other to create a cinematic experience like no other.
"More madness. More imperial mendacity. More Caligula.
"You know you’re curious."
When it came out—and up to now, I guess—I refused to see Nightwing because it was rated PG. I did flip through the Fotonovel at Newberry’s in Keyport, New Jersey, though.
As a kid, I always accompanied my mother to that department store because Keyport was home to the Strand theater, a porn palace outside of which I’d stare at the posters and try to soak up whatever sexual vibes I imagined the place was radiating.
Zombie I saw at the sensationally ramshackle Colonial theater in my edenic Keansburg, New Jersey.
That, for sure, wasn’t rated PG (I know: it wasn’t rated at all), and I was twelve.
Ah, those were the times.
F.K. vs. S.O.D.
Now it can be revealed—HEAVY METAL MOVIES: BUMMER IN THE SUMMER 2014 will be a day-long bacchanal of metal, movies, and marauding to be mounted at the triple-tiered, louder (and lustier) than life REGGIE’S ROCK CLUB smack in the thick of next year’s swelter season in Chicago.
The details will be an entire annus awesummus in the making.
So tell us what you want, who you want, how much, how often and… that’s it, because we already know how HARD and how LOUD you want it! The superheroic Elle Quintana and I are here to deliver!
Start by thinking in terms of a multiple metal bands, then a double feature of Black Roses and Rock-N-Roll Nightmare with director John Fasano in attendance accompanied by a live performance by THOR!
PREPARE NOW, YE METAL MOVIE MAYHEM MAKERS!!!!
All this is in celebration of HEAVY METAL MOVIES: THE BOOK. Be there!